The “iDimension”

Today I’m going to wander down a different path. As a blog writer, I tend to ramble on about my philosophical views of life in general, but today I’m going outside my sphere of knowledge and enter into the unknown (to me anyway).

I would like to propose a theory that another dimension exists. The iDimension.

My guess is that this theory could have something to do with physics, but admittedly, my knowledge of that particular science is limited to the assumption that Sir Isaac Newton invented the falling apple. Let me make my case now, and you can ridicule me when I’m done.

As I understand it, the iPhone and iPad are devices that allow the user to perform everyday tasks from the dinner table, office, train, plane, or automobile. The number of applications – those programs behind the icons – are as numerous as stars in the sky (slight exaggeration), and every business on Earth is working to develop their own “app” as a convenience to drive potential sales dollars to their company. I make these statements as a Blackberry user that is married to an “iPhone person”. I also have a young daughter that spends a significant amount of time on an iPad (a gift from Grandma) and does everything from homework to American Girl shopping while lying on the couch. But I digress.

My theory is that, sometime in the near future, we will experience a phenomenon that causes these “iDevice” people to disappear from the face of the earth. It may already have begun, but the process will accelerate to the point where vast numbers of humans will no longer be visible. They’ll wake up in the morning when their “iBot” alerts them that the sun is approaching the horizon (https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/azimuth-sunrise-sunset/id417438455?mt=8) $1.99 at the iTunes store. They’ll shower and head down for breakfast eating food ordered online and delivered directly to their door (http://www.peapod.com) before going to work (remotely) in the living room. After a long 2-hour day at the virtual office, it’s time to watch hours of TV, using the cable app to see what’s on…change channels…etc. A little chilly in the house, there’s an app for that too (http://www.comcast.com/home-security/automation.html). Need to exercise? There are numerous exercise apps available. Ordering dinner and having it delivered is also a slam dunk. You can make a reservation with O’Hare-Midway Limousine Service from your device and have a chauffeur driven meal brought to your doorstep. A little more TV viewing and before you know it, there are 10 free apps to help users get to sleep (http://www.shape.com/lifestyle/mind-and-body/10-free-iphone-apps-help-you-sleep-better-tonight).

I’m no scientist, but I can easily see how someone with a certain level of Agoraphobia could easily exist without ever venturing beyond their front door. They could simply live their life without the need for human contact. That being said, it will be like they are dwelling in an alternate dimension, because (if I’ve learned anything from Hollywood) that’s what an alternate dimension is all about…right? They’re here, but not really here.

As the picture comes more clearly into focus, I fear for the future of humanity. Soon, books and snail-mail disappear, then verbal communication, and before you know it, the planet will be as quiet as the woods in winter, lit only by the soft glow of the iPad app screen.

That will be a sad day, because my Blackberry and I will have no one to talk to.

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Dale Schahczinski
Goal driven team leader, with industry experience spanning all aspects of operations and administration.